The Pugpant Chronicles
Howard Pee Pugpants, AnnieBelly, Java Cheesy, and Hannah the Foster Puggy
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Pecan Toe Strikes Again!
This is Hannah, and I'm the foster puggy at the Medina Foster Home for Wayward Pugs. I've been living here with Howie and his minions for almost a year now, so I am pretty sure I'm going to be a permanent fixture, something foster mommy says she just cannot do without, even more so than chocolate or whippy creme on her coffee.
Yesterday I was afflicted with the dreaded Pecan Toe. I made foster mommy promise not to tell anyone, and she agreed we would never speak of it again. When I walked into the house, my little pinky toe felt so peculiar. Mom took a look and she had these wise words: "Wutt the heck???" She reached down and extricated a little empty pecan husk that had neatly wrapped itself around my unsuspecting toe. She let me sniff it thoroughly before she put it in the trash, calling it names and berating it for cramping Her Hannah Banana's style.
I felt much better after my toe was de-pecan shell-ized. I could hop around without making a clickety clack noise on the hardwood floor, and Howie stopped making comments about how much he liked Pecan Pie fresh out of the oven with ice cream on top. Foster mom said she thinks it's cute that a little southern gal like me would be the only puggy she has ever known to come down with a distinctly antebellum malady such as Pecan Toe. It's just one more reason I am special.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Night of the Living Fatties
This here is AnnieBee
When the zombies come, they are going to eat Howie first. Then Hannah, then Java (not because he is fat, but because he has froggy legs and smells like cheese), and lastly possibly me, depending on how fast zombies can run. Howie I went to grammy's house for Thanksgiving recently and I was able to get this photo of my brother sitting on grammy's bran new recliner. I told mommy he looks like a rump roast with fur, and she told me it wasn't nice to say things about your brother like that. I told mommy I cannot help that my little mind runs to food all the time, after all, I am a pug! So, my question for you is, in your house, when the zombies come, who would get eaten first? Hmmm?
Friday, January 6, 2012
Goodbye to Annie's Love, Bajas
This post is from long ago, when Annie first fell in love with Bajas. Today, Bajas has gone to the bridge, where he is running free and no longer in pain. Our hearts go out to his mom, Ane, and his fursiblings. We send love and comfort from across the world. Go gently, sweet Bajas, the beautiful boy of Annie's heart.
A story from when they first met:

A story from when they first met:
Hi, this here is Anniebelly. Today I want you to meet my
sweetiepuggy, Bajas who makes my heart go pitty pat.
sweetiepuggy, Bajas who makes my heart go pitty pat.

Handsome, isn't he? Look at those dreamy nose folds and
those big brown eyes. He has been hiding under the covers lately,
but posed for a photoshoot for the pug-parazzi yesterday.
Bajas is not only handsome, he is a brave metropolitan
puggy who is not afraid to take the city bus in Norway.
he is pretty sure Virus is adopted, since they eat different food and all.
*I love you Bajas! I am sending you kisses Airmail to Norway from Texas!*
*I love you Bajas! I am sending you kisses Airmail to Norway from Texas!*
Monday, December 26, 2011
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Howie Pee Christmas Pug Wishes All His Peeps Happy Howlidays
This here is Howie
I got a baff today for Christmas. Maw said I smelt like the bottom of a fish tank, and Santa wudd steer clear of my house if she didn't do somethin' pronto. She took me to see my girlfriend Nicole who adores me who gives me my baffs. Now I smell like roses, dog food, and farts. I hope all my good pug friends get visits from Pugmas Claws and get all the toys and prezzies they deserve, even AnnieSmelly.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Reality Pug TV - Howie's Live Pug Cam Video - Wild Pugs Doing Puggy Things

This here is Reality Show Pug Howie
I'm a star of my new show, Reality Pug TV. That there good lookin' pug laying in the orthopedic pug bed with two chicks is me. I'm the good lookin' one on the right. The two fat ones to the left are my sisters, Hannah and AnnieSmelly. My main man Java is there in the back, ready to do my biddin should I need a chilled beverage or the remote.
Maw and Paw hooked up the pug cam a few months ago and didn't tell me. I didn't find out about it til I got busted calling my girlfriend Pearley the other day on maws cell phone. Pearley and me we like to chat about important things, like making art out of our poo. Aye Tee and Tee got suspicious about excessive pugtexting and called maw at work one day, and that's when the turdleys hit the fan.
Now I just lay here all day, bossin my peeps, fartin on my sisters, and snoring. Tune in tomorrow for another riveting photo from the pug cam. Dad says with all this action and adventure, the pug cam is definitely not a premium channel, but what does he know. He should go back and play angry birds on his phone and mind his own bidness or somethin' already.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Dear Santa From AnnieBee
Dear SantaPaws,
This here is Your Favorite Pug AnnieBee. Mommee says I have been really especially good this year, when I am sleeping. She said when I am sleeping, I am not digging the bath towels in the washroom into a pile to pee on. She says when I am sleeping I am not attacking my reflection in the oven door. She says when I am sleeping, I am not barking at her art clients who come to the house for important transactions involving square things that hang on the walls and look at me with frozen smiles on their faces while I fuss at them for not paying attention to me. She says when I am sleeping I am not trying to give my brother Howie a spankin for being annoying. And she says when I am sleeping, I am cute as a little smooshy nose bug in a rug. So as you can plainly see, I am perfect except for nine or 10 things.
So please bring me everything in the Neiman Marcus catalog 2011 this year, especially the sparkley items.
Love, AnnieBee With Kissies (and little hearts as dots over the "i's" in kissies)
PS - If you could also find a home for my foster sissy, Hannah, that would be most appreciated. This whole sharing mama's lap thing is for the birds!
Labels:
annie's christmas wish list
Friday, December 2, 2011
Interview With Soon to Be Former Colgate Model AnnieBee
AnnieBee awaiting her teeth cleaning
I went to see Dr. Carter who adores me last week, cuz mama said I kept drooling. I told mama that feeding me more often would cure that problem, but she persisted since she is such a worry wart. Dr. Carter is a special tooth doctor with creedentials for orthodontia and he is from Alabama and he always tells everybody I'm the cutest pug he has ever seen, but who can blame him? The truth is, after mama left, Dr. Carter took seven of my teeth to add to the teeth necklace of mine he made last time I went to see him that I told yew about.
I tried to explain to his nurse that I need my pearly whites, most especially all my crooked bottom front teeth, since they are one of my endearing imperfections. *Howie rolls his eyes* But Dr. Carter insisted they were all broken and "just hanging on." I asked for some nice white veneers like Lindsey Lohan, but he thought I was joking! Then he got real worried, he told mama later, cuz he found a big pocket of infection under one of my back teeth. When I finally woke up from the sleepy juice, I had extra wrinkleys on my noggin, and everyone had to carry me around like a baby.
I enjoyed that attention, but now when I smile, all I see is gumline and my canine teefs showing! Howie said it makes me look more like a vampire, which is closer to my true nature, but mama is sad that my lip won't curl up for my signature snaggletooth smile any more. I think she's just upset that my Colgate spokespug contract could get canceled and so she can't spend money like a crazy mama any more. After all, how I can be their model any more now that I only gots a few toofs left? The worst part *baby pugs cover your ears and leave the room please* is I cannot play with any toys for TWO WEEKS. WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT??? *baby pugs can come back in the room now*
I tried to explain to his nurse that I need my pearly whites, most especially all my crooked bottom front teeth, since they are one of my endearing imperfections. *Howie rolls his eyes* But Dr. Carter insisted they were all broken and "just hanging on." I asked for some nice white veneers like Lindsey Lohan, but he thought I was joking! Then he got real worried, he told mama later, cuz he found a big pocket of infection under one of my back teeth. When I finally woke up from the sleepy juice, I had extra wrinkleys on my noggin, and everyone had to carry me around like a baby.
I enjoyed that attention, but now when I smile, all I see is gumline and my canine teefs showing! Howie said it makes me look more like a vampire, which is closer to my true nature, but mama is sad that my lip won't curl up for my signature snaggletooth smile any more. I think she's just upset that my Colgate spokespug contract could get canceled and so she can't spend money like a crazy mama any more. After all, how I can be their model any more now that I only gots a few toofs left? The worst part *baby pugs cover your ears and leave the room please* is I cannot play with any toys for TWO WEEKS. WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT??? *baby pugs can come back in the room now*
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Howie is a Thankful Pug
I am not thankful for this hat
This here is Howie
I jest read my pal Tweedley's thankful post and it got me to thinkin about all the stuff I am thankful for. I hope all yew of my friends had a good turkey day. Sorry I am late to say that to yew, I jest woke up from a turkey coma.
I am thankful for AnnieBee when she is sleepin and not annoyin me and barkin at the TV or her reflection in the oven door.
I am thankful for my brother Java, who grows cheese on his nose shelf and taught me to run from aluminum foil.
I am thankful for my foster sissy Hannah Banana, who reminded me of the importance of barkin at inanimate objects and kicking up the lawn after markin my terry-tory.
I am thankful for the tree maw brought into the house, too, although maw sez it is not for the purpose for which I have put it to use.
What are you thankful for? If it is food related, please explain in great detail, and use a lotta adjectives.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Hannah Banana, Foster Puggy Queen and Diva in Training
Hannah Banana and Mama
This here is Hannah
I'm the official foster puggy queen at the Medina Foster Home For Wayward Pugs, where I like to bark at leafs and trees and let everypuggy know I am the boss. I like to kick the grass after I bark the perimeter, and sometimes I burst outta the doggy door just to make sure no lurkers are out and about in my yard. Mama says I am the best guard puggy she has ever met, and I can tell Howie admires me. I taught Java Cheesy how to kick the grass too, so he has been working on that new skill, in addition to his current cheese production duties. I am 7 years old and look like a little froggy when I am sitting down. I love people, and when they come to visit I like to sit on their feets so they are sure to notice me. Mama says that I sound like a froggy when I bark, since I have a paralyzed larynx, but that just adds to my overall froggy charm. I was shy when I first came to Howie's house, but not anymore! Now I crawl right into the middle of the pile at bed time and go right to sleep. My snug buddy Howie makes a great pillow, but Annie will do in a pinch. This will be my first Christmas at Howie's house. He has been braggin' about all the food he gets, but so far all I see is his special panty-cree-att-itis menu getting served to him. I can't wait to see what Santa is going to bring me! What are you getting for Christmas? Enquiring puggy minds wants to know!
This here is Hannah
I'm the official foster puggy queen at the Medina Foster Home For Wayward Pugs, where I like to bark at leafs and trees and let everypuggy know I am the boss. I like to kick the grass after I bark the perimeter, and sometimes I burst outta the doggy door just to make sure no lurkers are out and about in my yard. Mama says I am the best guard puggy she has ever met, and I can tell Howie admires me. I taught Java Cheesy how to kick the grass too, so he has been working on that new skill, in addition to his current cheese production duties. I am 7 years old and look like a little froggy when I am sitting down. I love people, and when they come to visit I like to sit on their feets so they are sure to notice me. Mama says that I sound like a froggy when I bark, since I have a paralyzed larynx, but that just adds to my overall froggy charm. I was shy when I first came to Howie's house, but not anymore! Now I crawl right into the middle of the pile at bed time and go right to sleep. My snug buddy Howie makes a great pillow, but Annie will do in a pinch. This will be my first Christmas at Howie's house. He has been braggin' about all the food he gets, but so far all I see is his special panty-cree-att-itis menu getting served to him. I can't wait to see what Santa is going to bring me! What are you getting for Christmas? Enquiring puggy minds wants to know!
Labels:
Dallas Fort Worth Pug Rescue
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Howie Tootin' for the Cowboys
I'm gonna be tootin' for the Cowboys today. Who are you tootin' for?
Monday, November 7, 2011
AnnieBee's New Ducky Jammies
This here is AnnieBee
Aunty Punchy made me some custom tailored uber cute new ducky jammies so I am wearing them proudly today. Howie made a few comments but I think it's just cuz he is jealous that he doesn't have any ducky jammies. He said that these are the types of photos that go out on the Inter-Nett and get pugs in trouble when they apply for jobs or run for important presidential offices in the future. I happen to think that this here beautiful outfit will win me votes, don't you?
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Close Encounters of the Very Scary Kind
This here is AnnieBee.
I told yew the other day I would share something really scary, but that I just could not bring myself to talk about it yet. *fans self with paw* When mommy and daddy took me shopping at my fav boutique, Dogologie, I bumped into the scariest pug I have ever seen. He kept staring at me like he wanted to take my squeaky donut or something.
Daddy thought it was funny, and kept pushing the pug toward me with his foot. I didn't like that one bit, as you can see from my distressed countenance. Howie told me later that this was undoubtedly one of them pod pugs from the Invasion of the Puggy Snatchers movie. He said that was a Pee Gee rated movie and that's why mom and dad had not let me watch it before. He said I should always check with him first so he can make sure I am aware of the scary creepy monsters in the world and be totally prepared. In exchange for this protection service, he wants two bites of my lunch tomorrow before I start in on hogging it down. What do you think? Should I share my lunch so I will have protection? I really like my lunch, so I am in a tizzy.

Pod Pug had really beady eyes, too...
Monday, October 10, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
AnnieBee's Whirlwind Texas Hill Country Shopping Tour
This here is AnnieBelly
In case you've missed me, it's cuz I've been traveling seeing my peeps. Maw and Daddy took me to The Good Art Company Gallery last weekend so mom could hammer the walls and hang square things up and talk to people who were not offering me food. I always go with mommy to these places, everyone lines up to have their picture made with me because I am irresisty bull. (Howie rolls eyes).
I was devastated that Art Studio Dog Bob was unavailable for our much anticipated tryst, but Daddy whisked me away to the Cookie Bar at my fav boutique, Dogologie to assuage my achey breaky heart. After emptying the bottom shelves of the cookie bar, I glued myself to my full shoppy bag, which Daddy held just out of my reach for the excruciatingly long 2 minute walk to my limousine.
On the way home, mommy fed me five iced cookies in my fav colors. I attended to a nice chewy tendon in between massacreing three new toy squeakers. With the exception of not getting to bump noses with Bob, this was just about the most satisfactory trip I have ever taken to Freddyburg, especially since it was just me, and I got to leave the boys at home out of the public eye, where they belong.
Except for one terrifying awful encounter I will have to tell you about later, because right now I don't even want to remember it. Just envision Freddy Kruger meets JasonPuggy in a dark alley, and maybe you will get an idea.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Oo la la! Howard Pee PoofyPants Goes French!
This here ess Meester Howie
Today I have gone French with my new beret from Aunty Jessica of All You Need Is Pug! Magnifique, yes? er, no? My brother Java Fromage and sister Annie Smellee are so jealous of my new hat. How do you say "jump in the lake" in French? hmmm? *twirls hypothetical mustachio*
Monday, April 18, 2011
She Sleeps in Beauty
She Sleeps in Beauty, With Bunny
She sleeps in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
(With apologies to Lord Byron)
She sleeps in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
(With apologies to Lord Byron)
Labels:
annie takes nappies bunny pug
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
GIMME!
This here is Howie
My maw went to Pugapalooza last weekend and left me at home with Java and Annie. She said that I would jest be digging through people's bags for treats the whole time, so I could not go and enjoy this event where there was food. Have you ever heard such hooey in your life?
This here puggy in the picture is not related to me, but surely we have some common DNA cuz this puggy is saying GIMMEEEE that hot dog dad. It's what I wudda said, had I had the opportoonitty to be at pugapalooza. Instead, I was stuck here with Annie and Java. Did I say that alreddy? Anyway, they did raise lots of money for them rescue puggies, which is a good thing. It wudda been a better thing if'n I had been there to halp. Don't yew agree?
Your good pal, PeeMan
Labels:
hot dogs for hungry pugs rescue
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Howard Pee Pugpantsez Thirsty Thursday

Howie Hittin' the Bottle
This here is Howie
Dad let me walk to the mailbox with him yes-turd-day to get the mail and it was a long walk. I got real thursty, so I gotta drink. It was a long walk (did I say that alreddy?), about fourteen hunnert steps from the front door down the driveway to the mailbox, cuz I had to stop along the way and check my Tree In Front Yard. It had been all winter since I picked up my mail so yew can imagine it took me a while. I had to read some, reply, read some more, reply. I asked Maw to gimme a sausage when I got back in and she said NO HOWIEE. NO NO NO. Have you ever heard of such hooey? Can somepuggy please mail me a sausage? This special diet is for the birds, and yew know how I feel about birds.
Pee Ess, in case Hanklin was wondering, we was clean outta PBR so I hadta have water. Sheesh. I tell ya what.
Pee Ess, in case Hanklin was wondering, we was clean outta PBR so I hadta have water. Sheesh. I tell ya what.
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