Howie's Fan Club

Friday, December 2, 2011

Interview With Soon to Be Former Colgate Model AnnieBee

AnnieBee awaiting her teeth cleaning

This here is AnnieBee, soon to be former Colgate Model and spokespug.

I went to see Dr. Carter who adores me last week, cuz mama said I kept drooling. I told mama that feeding me more often would cure that problem, but she persisted since she is such a worry wart. Dr. Carter is a special tooth doctor with creedentials for orthodontia and he is from Alabama and he always tells everybody I'm the cutest pug he has ever seen, but who can blame him? The truth is, after mama left, Dr. Carter took seven of my teeth to add to the teeth necklace of mine he made last time I went to see him that I told yew about.

I tried to explain to his nurse that I need my pearly whites, most especially all my crooked bottom front teeth, since they are one of my endearing imperfections. *Howie rolls his eyes* But Dr. Carter insisted they were all broken and "just hanging on." I asked for some nice white veneers like Lindsey Lohan, but he thought I was joking! Then he got real worried, he told mama later, cuz he found a big pocket of infection under one of my back teeth. When I finally woke up from the sleepy juice, I had extra wrinkleys on my noggin, and everyone had to carry me around like a baby.

I enjoyed that attention, but now when I smile, all I see is gumline and my canine teefs showing! Howie said it makes me look more like a vampire, which is closer to my true nature, but mama is sad that my lip won't curl up for my signature snaggletooth smile any more. I think she's just upset that my Colgate spokespug contract could get canceled and so she can't spend money like a crazy mama any more. After all, how I can be their model any more now that I only gots a few toofs left? The worst part *baby pugs cover your ears and leave the room please* is I cannot play with any toys for TWO WEEKS. WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT??? *baby pugs can come back in the room now*